The Domesticated

seinfelt:

Awww, Jerryjerryjerry, you’re such a good boy! Who’s a good boy? You’re a good boy! Yeah! Oomph! Aw, Kramer, I love you too buddy, but stop licking my face! Ow! Elaine, did you just bite me! Oh no, oh no no no. George, you’ve been such a naughty boy! Digging through all the trash for food, again!

oedipus-sex:

imagine your current friend group but dwayne the rock johnson is an unquestioned part of it

The Higher Being

seinfelt:

Kramer and Newman walk through Central Park, Newman complaining about his various physical imperfections. “I’m fat, I stink, and just sitting down causes me to wheeze.” A lean, slow, short man walks past the two. “Hell,” Newman says, “I wish I could have that guy’s body!”

Elaine files her nails…

OH MY GOD